My Eardrums

I was asked the other day how my eardrums burst. For those people who know that I am losing my hearing, here is the story of why:

Okay. I know to start with, when I was 2 years old, I was sick and my right ear drum burst. Mom told me this. I've known this for a long time, but mom hasn't divulged any of the other information. Mom is only now telling me MANY medical things that should have been said a long time ago.

The second time. This was the first time for my left ear, but second time for my right ear. In January of 2001, I went to Florida for LotusSphere. I missed in 2000 because Cassi was born on 12/30/1999. LotusSphere was only 3 weeks later. Plus, because I was sick from having Cassi, 2000 was out. But, since I missed 2000, even after I was approved, that approval still stood for 2001. Because of all the programming I had been doing in Lotus Notes at that point. Besides being pregnant with Cassi, Ralph wanted me in the office more often so my clients could find me. I was soooo busy. I was managing anywhere from 6-12 projects at a time, all with Lotus Notes.

The week before I was to leave, I got the flu. I was feeling better enough to get down to Florida and knew that the week would be just fine. On the flight down, my right ear hurt so bad, that I believe I burst the ear drum, but didn't lose my hearing. I couldn't believe how HOT it was for January. Plus, I was really out of shape for all the walking I did. I know now that I could handle the walking.

I was almost completely better by Wednesday of the week I was there. Then, I caught a chill in one of the conferences. The flu came back, but worse. Thursday of that week, I didn't even get to any of the last conferences because I was so sick. I just spent the day in bed. But, I had to leave Friday to come home. The flight home was the worst. On the way up, my ears hurt so bad. On the landing, my left ear hurt so bad that the ear drum burst. I know it happened because by the time I got home, my left ear was bleeding out, and I couldn't hear.

So, I was rushed off to my primary care doctor. He was the same doctor I had when we first moved here. He then rushed me off to the hospital right near his office to see an ENT. Yep, I had burst my ear drum and had lost my hearing. As a matter of fact, I lost my hearing for 4 days. I couldn't use the phone at all. Luckily I had my laptop and could email my clients at work.

The next Friday, after coming home, etc. I was scheduled for a follow-up appointment with the primary care doctor. A half hour before leaving for the appointment, I was called by my office, telling me that I had been laid off. It was a DAMN good thing I had my laptop at home. And, I almost went to work that day. But, I figured that I needed one more day at home and would go Monday because I had meetings. I was able to dump everything off my computer and erase it before taking it in on Monday. There were over 400 of us laid off that day. Most of my co-workers knew because their banks called, asking where these large deposits were coming from. Since it wasn't pay day, they were perplexed. We got our severence check and last pay check the same day.

Ever since then, my hearing has been steadily getting worse. Do you know how you can hear the bugs humming at night on a clear day? Well, I hear that every day in both my ears. Plus, when I have been under a lot of stress during the day, it almost drowns everything out in my ear in the evenings. I have been to 3 different ENTs, plus a Otolarynologist (specialized ENT). There is an assumption that I might have Meniere's Disease (mom's got it too), but haven't been able to get an ENT to confirm it. All I get is, "You're losing your hearing and there's nothing we can do about it. Sorry." No one appears to want to help. Plus, added to the hearing loss is also vertigo. I just had it Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday this week. It's not any fun. Luckily, I am understanding everything at school.

So, this is part of my problem with getting jobs. I can't really get administrative jobs because being on the phone too much is a problem for me. And, with admin jobs, they are all phone work. Plus, all the jobs think I'm too over qualified to be considered. So, I will get my Bachelor's Degree and see where it takes me. I am keeping my options open for news reporting, along with my English options, but I want my English Degree. I can always decide later to get a second Bachelor's after I've been working.

Okay. That's about it for now. I'm getting a headache again. Hopefully, my glasses come in soon. I'm getting 2 pairs. Luckily, they are going to cost about $120, one pair for reading and one pair for driving. I'll get pictures of me when I get them. Plus, my hair is short now again, too.

Love to all,
Cathy
8^ )